These New Emojis Are Everything
These New Emojis Are Everything
Apple released new emojis with iOS 15.4, and let's just say that we think you're gonna like 'em!
Shameless Plug: We’re hosting a live sketch show tomorrow with some of our favorite writers and comedians in Brooklyn. Tickets available here online or at the door! Doors at 6:30, show at 7.
Slay. Apple released some new emojis with its latest update that have us screaming and crying. Here it is: your guide to the brave new world of the new emojis. A Low Lift Ask Exclusive. Make sure your phone’s updated so you can see all the new ones!
□ Guy Walking a Cat. Damn, the Unicode consortium went inclusion mode when they included cat owners in their latest and greatest update that’s sure to have you wet! Finally—an emoji for that most refined of pets, the humble feline. Can someone say representation win?
□ Verbatim. Wow. I don’t know how the designers at Apple did it, but they absolutely went off when they made this new emoji that perfectly captures the concept of saying things verbatim. Yes!
□ Aloe Blacc. Hey—we’ve all seen the David Bowie emoji 👨🎤. Now, there’s an emoji for those with more discerning taste. Meet the Aloe Blacc emoji, a modern update to Bowie’s old-skool charm. This is an emoji that will definitely have you singing classic Aloe Blacc lyrics, like “When I’m wiser and I’m older.”
□ Trypophobia. An emoji for us! Hey, gather round, because I’m gonna tell you something—I have a fear of little holes and stuff. And finally, I can see myself on screen, with this emoji that has. me. shaking.
□ Chenqui. This is something Borat says, I think. They made an emoji for this because Sacha Baron Cohen is Steve Jobs’ biological brother. It was a shoutout. Look it up if you don’t believe me…
□ Emoji keyboard. An emoji for the emoji keyboard? Meta much? What’s next? An emoji for the emoji user? An emoji for the discerning emoji user who has less standard tastes? Whose proclivities could best be described as deeply unnatural? They need to make emojis for people with unnatural proclivities… who agree??
□ Summer of George. Stinky, sweaty, nasty, George. This sick fuck is sweating through an entire summer. Someone get this man some of Kramer’s cologne!
Nabeel’s Footnote
They should make an emoji for telling your boys that Michael Mann’s new show is now streaming on HBO Max.